so much to be thankful for. so much to be hands tied air sucking honest ugly crying red high heels and faith professing even jesus loving shit to be thankful for. a family born from blood and from pain and from laying mulch and pulling weeds and letting the son’s hair grow and believing in the mistakes of the father and coughing on the restlessness of one thousand risky spirits. digging holes not meant for graves, just shovels and truth. thankful for the similar bone structure. for matching freckles and matching laughs.
thankful for friends and steaming showers and soft playing records, for piecing together the truth and for cracking apart the backbones of river wading dumpster divers. thankful for the secret keepers, for their beautiful connected veins. for perfection found around a mouth pushing vowels into open space. words to be trapped and jotted and multiplied and noosed around golden ticking heartbeats. thankful for the to and fro of a handful of soulmates, blissful and youthful and weathered so sweetly. glued tight like book chapters. like the legs of a grander machine.
thankful for heartache, for the pendulum and its predictability. thankful for the rue of winter that comes tucked in coat pockets, for the slicing betrayal of warm weather in fall and for the necessary trails of slime left behind. for the complications, the simplicity, the single answers to impossible endings. thankful for life. for ability. for failure spun like sugar making cobwebs. for the gratitude that comes shredding out so easily. thankful for gender and mind fucks and cavern eyes and a certain tone of voice. for fear. thankful for two billion memories, for songs and colored pens and holding hands and sharing lives. for nothing i remember, for everything i forget.
thankful, in general, for infinite unbelievable transcendent love
and for my words that cannot come close to containing it.